This post is a departure from my usual discussion about a significant book I’ve been reading. This past weekend I shared in the celebration of life of the woman who was my best friend in high school, and the synchronicity of events that took place will forever be a part of my most cherished memories.
I met up with Sue’s sons the evening before the memorial service. We laughed and cried as I shared high school stories her sons had never heard. I was struck by what beautiful men her sons are, and I know why Sue was so proud of these young men and the fathers they had become. When going through her apartment, they had found a manilla envelope with my name on the outside and a card on the inside that she had planned to give me one day. Sue had always called me her “Forever Friend,” and now this card was proving that even after her death I was learning just how much I had meant to her. Here is what that card said:
YOU ARE THE FRIEND I WILL CHERISH FOREVER
Once in a long while,
someone special walks into your life
and really makes a difference.
They take the time
to show you in so many little ways
that you matter.
They see and hear the worst in you,
but don’t walk away;
in fact, they may care more about you.
Their heart breaks with yours,
their tears fall with yours,
their tears fall with yours,
their laughter is shared with yours.
Once in a long while,
two special friends
have to go their separate ways.
Every time you see a certain gesture,
hear a certain laugh or phrase,
or return to a certain place,
it reminds you of them.
You treasure the time you had with them,
and you thank God that someone
can still touch your heart so deeply.
You remember their words, their looks,
their expressions;
You remember how much of themselves
they gave — not just to you, but to all.
You remember the strength
that amazed you,
the courage that impressed you,
the grace that inspired you,
and the love that touched you.
by Laurie Winkelmann
The card has no handwritten note, but the fact that it was in an envelope with my name on it is a powerful reminder of what it means to be a forever friend.
The service was held in a beautiful Catholic church in South Lake Tahoe. It was a spectacularly sunny afternoon, and the sun lit up the stained glass with the beauty that must have been envisioned by its artist. When the priest asked us to rise for a prayer, the snowcapped mountains were framed by a clear window above the priest. It was the perfect day (Sue’s birthday) and the perfect setting for a celebration of life for a beautiful and dynamic woman.
Many years ago, when a high school friend was setting up an alumni website, he asked us to send photos and information we would like posted on our individual pages. He also asked for a song from our high school days that could play when someone came to our page. I didn’t know why I had him attach this particular song, but despite my blue eyes, I loved the Van Morrison song, “Brown-Eyed Gilrl.” As my husband and I drove past the church on our way home the following morning, I was thinking about all the great times with Sue and how much we had loved each other. I was sharing yet another story with my husband when “Brown-Eyed Girl” came on the radio. Sue was the brown-eyed girl, and the words “…now that I’m on my own…” had new meaning. I laughed and cried to think that this song would no longer be my song, it would be OUR forever friends song.
